Yesterday was a great morning! I went out shopping with my mom, nephew and niece. I have a great breakfast and lunch and didn't snack on other things! I Got over 15,900 steps and went for a fast, short run with my sister! For dinner I had lentil burgers (2) and a bagged salad from costco with dressing (3 cups).
Once I got home I started to snack a little too much. I ate grapes (LOTS of them), Peanut butter and on a wrap (Twice), and a few (3?) sugar cookies (not iced). Part of this eating was habit, when I cook I snack! When I bake I snack. Part of it was this urge to eat. I was home alone and I didn't feel full enough. After I ate it I felt too full and satisfied but guilty. Guilty that I don't have more control over what I'm doing, guilty I couldn't say no.
Today during my devotions. I read about Jesus healing the leaper. He just came up to Jesus and aid heal me! And Jesus did! My prayer today is that Jesus would begin to heal me. That he would heal me from this compulsion, this disease. That he would do it and that I would worship him for it and live a life that reflects hat he has done for me. This has been my prayer before but I've always been reserved as to what else he wants to do in me. I have wanted him to fix problem A but not touch anything else. Lord, I know it's not easy when you change people, I know it could be incredibly painful but Lord, Im ready to live for you. I'm ready to obey you. Lord, I will do my best but I will need you strength becuase I am weak.